Blind Faith

Life is full of many tough decisions, but picking your favorite sports team isn't one of them. Most of us were indoctrinated at a very young age, much like the kids in Jesus Camp. And like those kids, we too have our little rituals, warped thinking, extreme loyalty and a deranged enthusiasm for our sports teams. But I live in Kansas City. I only have three. For me, it's all about the Royals, Chiefs and Kansas Jayhawks. We have no NBA or NHL team, and it is simply not enough for me. That's why I have decided that the time is now to choose sides. No longer will I watch professional basketball or hockey with an objective eye. And just to make sure I get my sports fill, I'm going to pick a NASCAR driver as well.

But how do I go about doing this? I can't simply just pick some teams. That would be too biased, plus I don't want to be that guy who becomes a Lakers/Penguins/Jimmie Johnson fan because they happen to be winning at the time. In other words, I don't want to be LeBron James.

The only true way is through complete randomization. For that, I turned to random.org's List Randomizer. And to bring myself a little bit of fortune, my teams and driver will be the eighth down the list; my lucky number.

The results: Detroit Pistons, Minnesota Wild and Greg Biffle.

I can live with the Pistons, who are a storied franchise, even if they seem to be headed for a quick free fall. They've always had that hard-nosed, blue-collar toughness, which I like. They hate Chicago, and I can back that up as a KC resident. Their last championship, in 2004, was under coach Larry Brown, who led my beloved Jayhawks to a national championship in 1988. I can work with this.

The other two are a bit tricky, since I have never really followed hockey or racing. But that was really the whole point; becoming a fan of one team/driver will help me in becoming a fan of those sports. I need a rooting interest.

So there it is, my new distractions. I now have a stake in all the major sports, and my loyalties will not waver. Well, until the Sprint Center finds some tenants, that is.